Christian Life Coaching is growing increasingly popular. Churches increasingly use coaching in their pastoral and discipleship ministries, and many coaches offer life coaching online. But some of what is called coaching isn’t actually coaching, which is a lot more than advice, guidance, listening, and supporting. There is a specific methodology and structure to coaching that distinguish it. So when someone offers you coaching, or tells you they are coaching you, check to make sure that they are doing what they claim to be doing! Of course, Christian life coaching isn’t the only method of personal development available. So before we define what coaching actually is, let’s look at what it isn’t! Here are five other personal development methods:
Christian Life Coaching Is Not Therapy
Therapy tends to look to the past to deal with an issue in the present. It will look backwards to identify and address the root causes of negative patterns of behaviour or attitude. Therefore, it will tend to focus exclusively on a single issue. It also has a medical edge to it, potentially involving psychiatry and psychology. However, coaching is more focused on the present, with an eye on a desired vision for the future. It is more holistic, as a coaching process will look at any issues that affect the journey towards the desired goal. Therapy focuses only on the single issue; coaching focuses on the desired goal and will deal with any issues that affect that. In effect, coaching looks to unlock the present potential within a person to help them grow. Therapy looks for growth by addressing issues from the past.
Coaching and Counselling Are Different
Counselling is similar to therapy in that it looks to the past to address and resolve a particular issue. Counselling is therefore past-orientated and aimed towards people who have significant life-affecting issues. It aims to create a better present by addressing the past. In effect, counselling looks to create a better present by dealing with the past. Coaching looks to create a better future by transforming the present.
It isn’t Advising, Teaching or Training
Advising, teaching and training is the impartation and transfer of knowledge or skills to students. This is driven by the advisor, teacher or trainer, meaning there is a clear hierarchy and dominance in this kind of developmental relationship. However, coaching is much more like a support partnership. In effect, teaching and training look to the teacher or trainer to provide the answers. Coaching looks to the client to provide his or her own answers, supported and guided by a coach.
Consultancy is not Coaching
Consultancy is looking to an expert in a field to come in and bring an external, objective viewpoint to improve or develop an area. In effect, a consultant is bringing their own set knowledge into a situation. This can be inflexible and set in stone, and either accepted or rejected. A coach partners with a client in a dynamic, evolving and flexible process meaning there will always be something of value. In addition, the client under guidance from the coach looks to himself as the answer to his questions and situation. In effect, a consultant is looked to for the answers whereas, with coaching, the client is guided and supported to find their own answers.
Mentoring And Christian Life Coaching Are Not The Same
Mentoring is an instructional relationship, based on equipping specific knowledge or skills to a client. This means the mentor must have experience or expertise in the relevant field. Coaching helps clients find their own way and encourages them to look to themselves for their own growth. In effect, mentoring is dependent on the mentors’ ability to transfer skills; coaching is dependent on the client to answer their own questions.
What is Christian Life Coaching?
Life coaching is designed to achieve the clients desired progress and development in an individual’s life. It takes both a clients current situation and their envisioned future, and helps plot a practical and progressive journey between the two.
Life coaching is very much an ongoing partnership between coach and client, with an evolving dialogue between the two parties to help achieve desired targets. Because of this, the coaching process will be goal-orientated and therefore less likely to be a longer term endeavour.
Coaching enables clients to get clarity and therefore make purposeful strategic decisions. It also empowers them to break through obstacles, and grow into their potential.
Life coaching involves many things for both clients and coach. Both parties require time and patience for the process to bear fruit, as well as an openness towards each other. In addition, a commitment to the process – and therefore the other party – are essential. The coaching process demands certain things of the coach – namely possession of a specific set of skills. However for the client, the encouragement is less on skills and more on having a correct attitude from the beginning.
In my coaching, I tend to use the following process:
Conclusion
Each of us is individuals with our own stories, complexities and layers. Christian life coaching brings a systematic process to a person to provide a framework for growth, yet has enough flexibility that is a truly personalised experience. Coaching allows each of us to focus on our own growth, and with a partner, develop ourselves so we can be the best we can be.
This post is part of a series focusing on coaching. The series posts are:
- What Christian Life Coaching Is – And 5 Things It Isn’t
- 3 Focuses of Healthy Life Coaching for a Christian
- 5 Essentials For Clients of Christian Life Coaches
- 4 Keys To Unlocking Your Life Purpose As A Christian
To find out more about what coaching with me looks like and what you’ll benefit from, click here.
